So here we are. You’ve planned, you’ve discussed, you prepared your play kit and your bodies (including the all-important footwear). You’ve warmed up, you’ve lubed up. Then there was pegging. And it was (hopefully) good. Now, for the moment, you have come to the end of your pegging adventure. But our revels here have not yet ended, because aftercare adds the final touch to an excellent evening.
Pegging, particularly for people exploring it for the first time, can be an almost overwhelming experience. The first time we tried it, I thought Slave D had been knocked offline because of the look in his eyes. And sometimes we can fight against moments of shame because something felt so good or we enjoyed something that felt a little taboo and that’s where aftercare comes into its own.
Aftercare
What is aftercare? Put in the simplest terms, it’s physical or emotional care after an act or event, normally written about in terms of post-BDSM play.
Being on the receiving end of penetration can be quite a vulnerable and emotional experience, especially for cis men or others who are trying it for the first time in their life. Likewise, it can feel overwhelming to take up the unfamiliar role of a pegger.
When sex is over and toys are washed, take some time to get close to each other and, you guessed it, communicate. Talk through what you’ve just done together during the pegging session. What did they like? What didn’t they like? What did you like, and what didn’t you like? Will there be a next time? If so, do either of you have any suggestions on what you would like to do differently?
Our top 6 post-pegging aftercare activities
If you’ve never intentionally done aftercare before, let the House of Denial guide you with some of our favourite post-peg pursuits. All of these things will help you to minimise sub-drop after play, which is particularly important if you’ve incorporated some BDSM elements into your session, but also it can help you both continue to feel connected to each other, even if you are no longer physically connected by the butt.
Feel free to use any or all of these in your aftercare!
1. “....Pizza?”
Slave D and I are simple people at heart, and nothing makes us happier than a post-peg pizza. Your mileage may vary, but making some food together or ordering a takeaway is a moment of simple delight that helps us centre ourselves again.
Connecting through food and nourishing your body after enthusiastic bedroom activities is our favourite form of aftercare. Just don’t forget to drink something as well - we’ve avoided cramps during the pegging, don’t let your guard down and end up with a late night foot cramp!
2. Brain-fluff watching - engage!
This is also a tried-and-true method for us, normally coupled with pizza. If you’re the peggee and it was your first time - or if you’ve included some BDSM practices into the pegging session - you might need something ‘uncomplicated’ as you come out of subspace or just want to enjoy the post-orgasm haze.
Don’t put on some Ingrid Berman or Christopher Nolan films - no shade to either, but you need something easy to digest. Get a comedy or action film on, like “Airplane!” or “Fast and the Furious”, or some fluff TV like “Brooklyn 99”, “Taskmaster” or “Nailed It!”
3. Gonna wash that lube right out of my hair
Okay, maybe we shouldn’t be expecting to find lube in our hair (but lube works in mysterious ways), but after sex, there might be all sorts of fluids everywhere! So clean-up time is also a fun aftercare activity.
Go into the bathroom together and get cleaned up together. You might not want to shower together (ah the external struggle of rotating out of the water spray and being chilly), but chat as you wash, or shower or bathe together. If you’re really on it, you can bring some of the toys into the shower with you (if it’s safe to do so) and clean them off too.
4. Go go gadget jizzing
You might not come during pegging, particularly if you’re the peggee. Not all sexy-times have to end in orgasm, but if you’re still feeling a bit pent-up after the pegging (and possible teasing) or if you’ve been caged as well, then why not finish the evening with one big final orgasm?
Oh, and five points to you if you got the title reference.
5. Blankets and cuddles
Pegging can be physically and sometimes emotionally draining. When you do something that makes you feel vulnerable, and the thing is over (the thing is pegging, not my penis for clarity), then you can feel a bit empty or bereft. Doing something physically intimate but not necessarily sexual can help bring you both closer together.
Also, if you’ve gotten hot and heavy, you will cool down afterwards. So throw your duvet or some blankets over you, create a little blanket cocoon for you both and maybe chat through the play. What was good, what were you surprised by, do you want to do it again?
6. Nap times
Alternatively, the comfort of the post-peg cuddle-puddle you might be in may prove too alluring and you might find yourself having a wee nap instead. There’s no shame in that either, some people are exhausted post-orgasm and the siren song of sleep is just too hard to resist.
My final thoughts
And there we have it folks! We’ve shared everything we think you might need to know to start your pegging journey.
While pegging isn’t a kink for everyone, it can certainly be a fun addition to your sex life and your chastity journey when done right - and one in which has personally hugely enriched our intimate lives together. I hope that you’ve found the information we’ve shared useful in some way and maybe even if you are a seasoned pegging pro or a pegging protégée, there’s something new you’ve learnt.
Which leads me into my final Mistress K advice point. Pegging doesn’t need to be too serious, so enjoy yourselves and find humour when things don’t completely go to plan. People and bodies are wonderful and hilarious and messy - don’t expect pegging sex to be any different.
What are your thoughts on pegging? Is there anything obvious we missed that we should include? Please share with us in the comments below, or mention us @HouseofDenial on X.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Mistress K
Mistress K (she/her) is a queer kinky woman and in a long-term chastity-led relationship with Slave D, the other half of the dynamic duo who run House of Denial.
Thoughtfully dedicated to consent-led BDSM practices and interactions, Mistress K supports our community via our customer service channels (does that make her a service top domme?) by engaging with anyone interested, enthusiastic or curious about chastity.
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